Part of Almaguin Pride Network’s mission has always been to create an open dialogue with the communities we serve. Speaking With Pride, our new blog, is one of our next steps towards connecting with 2SLGBTQ+ people and allies in the Almaguin Highlands. We are sharing open conversations with members of our community, offering a platform for queer voices in our area.
Q: How long have you lived in the Almaguin Highlands?
Two years.
Q: What’s something you can share about yourself?
I enjoy volunteering, meeting new people, and camping with my partner.
Q: How do you identify, and what does this identity mean to you?
On the daily, I just identify as a queer person. I’ve come to use this umbrella term because of my shifting relationships with my own identities over the years. To navigate this shift required a lot of energy, such as asking and answering my own internal questions of “Do I want to paint my nails today?” and “Why?”. As I came to understand gender as a concept and how it applies to me, I asked the follow-up question of ‘why’ more and more. And now, I don’t have the energy to more specifically define my identities for other people. I know I am queer, I accept whatever that means to me on that day, and I’ll choose to share the specifics of that experience with close friends, as it is pertinent to the situation.
Q: What does Pride mean to you?
Pride is a place - the physical manifestation of which is often represented as a summer festival by and for our community. But this festival is a representation of our inner journeys. As freeing as it feels after the fact, it is often forgotten how difficult it can be to go to your first Pride. To reach that point where you can stand up with others who have undergone parallel journeys, however that journey was, and say “I’m here too!”. Literally and metaphorically, we put in the effort to reach our destination. We may have spent the money on a gender-affirming wardrobe, and it might have cost us relationships. Tears were undoubtedly shed. It’s not an easy journey, but then we go to Pride and we can breathe. All that effort is worth it. And you’re not alone in feeling that.
Q: How has your experience as a member of the 2SLGBTQ+ community shaped your life?
20 years ago, in the small town I grew up in, I came out as bisexual. I was a young teenager who didn’t know there was any reason to keep this to myself. But every teen experience became clouded by the social anxiety of this elephant in the room - the thing everyone knew but didn’t talk about. That persistent feeling led to me regretting coming out so early, because it was isolating. The depression was deep. However, once I found the 2SLGBTQ+ community, it was quite honestly the beautiful rainbow after the rain. There were many years of challenges still to work through within myself and within my relationships, but at least I was no longer alone. Through the positive influence of other community members, I started to become more comfortable in my own skin. It was transformative in the way it changed how I perceived myself. Now, looking back, I view coming out at such a young age not as a regret but as a sort of headstart. Because I knew myself at a young age, I have been able to do the inner work and become a more authentic version of myself at an earlier age.
Q: How do you think your identity has shaped your time in the Almaguin Highlands?
With this authenticity and self-assuredness came the confidence to move back to a small town from a larger city. Despite having a rough go in a small town when I was a young queer person, it felt like the right time for such a move. I was no longer afraid of my past. There was anxiety, of course - I was apprehensive about how receptive folks in a small town would be to folks of visible queerness, and how I would make friends without such a community. However, I was confident enough to take the leap. Lo and behold! I found there is a 2SLGBTQ+ community here after all!
Q: What do you think needs to change in the Almaguin Highlands to create a more accepting community?
One step in the right direction would be establishing more outlets for self-expression. We need more spaces to just ‘be’ and embrace all ways of being, regardless of gender or sexual orientation, so long as it doesn’t infringe on the safety and security of others. The events that Almaguin Pride hosts are spaces to just ‘be’ - a space that welcomes you in from the rain and says “Regardless of your worries, leave them at the door, and embrace the beauty of the moment with your fellow community members”.
Q: What’s one piece of advice you would give queer youth growing up in the Almaguin Highlands?
I believe that ‘good attracts good’. If you do the work on yourself and learn to like yourself, your energy will attract like-minded people. Give yourself grace for mistakes, chalk it up to ‘growth & development’, and keep having fun in the process of learning.
